My friend, Y, is a gem of a speaker. Possessed with the gift of gab, he can, with quite ease, discuss philosophy; orient as well as occident. Literature is his mien and is comfortable with both Shakespeare and Ghalib besides making frequent references to Stevenson and Oscar Wilde during his conversations. He is one amongst a few Kashmiris who has read Lord Macaulay’s `The history of England'. To be a part of his gossip band is not only a fun but a learning experience as well.
But, let me not get swayed by his literary and philosophical prowesses because my point under discussion here is different. It is not about Mr.’Y' but about a teasing `P' which remains conspicuously present on the mount of moon, just at the root of the thumb, of his left hand. It appears as if he has got it tattooed from a road side vendor. Whenever he is on his marathon lectures on the topics of his choice my concentration slips from his discourses and get fixed on that pestering `P'. Why invariably it has to be there? I would ask myself”. May be, it has something to do with his not so romantic past or may be  `P' is the first letter of the name of  some important medicine that he needs to take on daily basis and the sight of this reminds him of it. I would pretend giving full ears to his sermons but the demon of curiosity in my brains would restlessly demand an askance for this `P'.
One fine evening, as weather being favorably elixiring some good conversation I and my friend at my pied-a Terre started discussing vegetables. As usual he took the role of some Greek sophist and began patatoing and tomatoing. All of a sudden, I asked, what this `p' meant for him while half-heartedly entertaining the assumption that he likes “pumpkins” but that was not to be. He paused and vouchsafed an expression that was half a smile and half a restraint but then said, `Com’on man, your teasing conjectures about some Messalina of my past need not to be written on my palms but it stands chiseled in the sweetest chambers of my heart. And regarding medicine, he continued, since my better half retired from govt service, she has inculcated this habit of reminding me to take medicine six times a day, though I have to take it once only. `But why so', surprisingly I enquired. `Because she has nothing else to do, he replied with an expression that revealed helplessness and self pity.
Without waiting for some expected sympathies from me for his pathos, he said that all his life he stood for certain values and principles which he regarded as very important for his life while serving as a govt official and while facing the society where sycophancy, hypocrisy and greed was the norm. But what about `P' I tried to ask. He, without waiting for me to complete my enquiry placed his right palm in front of my face  while making an expression that directed me to be quite and wait for him to unfold the mystery of `p'. There were occasions, when I found that I sacrificed my principles and values because of the temptations, fears, favors or for some  other reason but later filled me with remorse, guilt and repentance with the result I would suffer inwardly for a long period of time. This resulted in some sort of vicious circle. So, in order not to be carried away I wrote this `p' on my palm which would always remind me of my `personality'. I would ask myself that nothing was more important than my personality which I ought to value more than anything else in this world. He got up, stood very erect, looked on the dark patches of cumulous in the evening skies and said proudly, it has helped me live better and dignified and when I will pass away my meandering soul in the cosmos would say that it was proud to have spend a great life in the body of `Y'.
I thought and thought and asked myself how many of us have defined ourselves with a personality to live with and to die with and give our soul a moment of pride that it had occupied a worthy body during its earthly sojourn with a personality that didn’t get swayed and carried away with the mundane and worldly short-lived temptations.
Looking with admiration at Yusuf I asked him that the philosophy of `P' was really something special. Nodding affirmatively at me he said that he got benefitted with `P' with something more as well which he would share with me provided I keep it a secret. I promised so.
“You know the name of my wife starts with `P' and she continues to live with the impression that it was the `P' of her name that continues to occupy my palm along with the mounts of Saturn and Venus.” He said but this time sheepishly.

(Parveez Sajad Ganai is Dy. Director Handicrafts, Govt. of J&K. Feedback at psganai@gmail.com)

Lastupdate on : Mon, 8 Aug 2011 21:30:00 Makkah time
Lastupdate on : Mon, 8 Aug 2011 18:30:00 GMT
Lastupdate on : Tue, 9 Aug 2011 00:00:00 IST