The chase of the century finally came to an end on Monday as Osama bin Laden, the latest in the series of superheroes, anti-christs, super villains, (depending upon the side you were cheering with) was killed/martyred (again depending upon the colours your team wears) by the American ground forces.  The event showcased the supposed success of American intelligence and a total failure of intelligence on part of the rest of the world which swallowed the different versions of the story, without so much as a belch. A lot of murky water still surrounds the death and subsequent ‘burial at sea’ of bin Laden but you can rest assured that it will not only be cleared but served as coke in the days to come.
Trust American ingenuity to fire the imagination of the whole world. In the last century when H G Wells’ ‘War of the Worlds’ was broadcast as a radio play, people were so frightened that the Martians have indeed landed that they came out on the streets. In the beginning of this century the story was replayed, only this time around it was not the Martians but Al Qaida who were supposed to have landed. The world had in the meantime progressed far beyond the radio and so Al Qaida became a household name and Osama bin Laden the Santa Claus of Terror who could drop in himself or a load of bombs through your chimney no matter which country you lived in. In case anyone ever got his wits together and started to wonder aloud why Uncle Sam (who never tires of swearing by justice and democracy) was bombing women and kids in some remote (and yet perhaps oil rich) area, you just had to yell ‘bin Laden’ and the collected wits would take wing.
  Now there is nothing new about the Americans creating super-heroes and diabolical super-villians. And then again they have never shied away from borrowing heroes or to be more apt characters from the east and adapting them to the flavor of the times. Disney borrowed Aladdin and Sinbad from the Arabian Nights and in recent times Uncle Sam went even further and started borrowing Arabian Knights instead.
Bin laden was not the first, neither for sure the last Arabian Knight to hit the limelight. Remember that old American blockbuster 'Mujahideen vs the godless Soviets’. Bin laden who made his debut in a minor role in this blockbuster of yesteryears was to be chosen for the role of the anti-Christ in the latest remake of the Armageddon. The Western audiences are always ready for an anti-hero, the antichrist. The beleaguered Muslim world fed upon a steady diet of past glory and ever so fond of the hyperbole, had a ready made hero dangled in front of them. They hungrily lapped him up as they had Saddam and as they will whosoever is presented to them in future. So there you had him and the rest is history.
Take that other Arabian knight, Saddam Hussein, who starred in ‘Gulf War I’ and its sequel the ‘Gulf War II’ and the subsequent gory sequel to both these. The weapons of mass destruction, whatever that is supposed to mean, are yet to be found. There was that white powder/anthrax scare. There is an interesting story about that as well. The source being rather unreliable, I won’t vouch for the veracity of this one. The reader has a choice, take it for a fact or take it with a pinch of salt. It is said that the anthrax scare started when on waking up from an uneasy slumber one morning President Bush found some white powder on his pillow. An emergency meeting was called at the Pentagon and after considering all possibilities it was decided the powder was most likely to be anthrax unless proved otherwise. The illogical war on Iraq suddenly had a ‘biological weapons’ angle added to it among other things.  It is said that on analysis it was ultimately found that the powder was nothing but presidential dandruff but by then the anthrax scare had really hit the ceiling and it was doing just fine.
Everybody knows where the next episode of Arabian Knights is going to come from. The trailers have already been flashing on our television screens, the movie will premier any time now! And then there are more to come, it may very well get to be 1001 Arabian Knights one day.
 Meanwhile nearer home, the Indian media, cute as always, seems to be in an orgasmic frenzy since the news about bin Laden broke. At times one can’t escape the thought that the Indian psyche has never really forgiven Columbus for his historical blunder, for landing on the wrong shore and mistaking it for India. One mistake by that seasick bloke and we missed our chance! Why just imagine, India might have been America today! The thought that the Red Indians got the privilege of hosting America (even if they became nearly extinct in the process) is enough to turn every real Indian green with envy. Not that we don’t try our best to be America. They have their American idol, we have our Indian idol; they have their Hollywood, we are neck to neck with them with our Bollywood. Granted that Bollywood makes movies in Hindi but when it comes to those film award functions don’t we make sure to speak only in English that too with an American slang! They had their 9/11, we had our 26/11, even if that involved a neat somersault of dates but then what’s a little remix between friends. With this state of being almost America (Woe to Columbus!) it shouldn’t come as a surprise if the Indian Army chief thinks that an Indian version of Operation Geronimo is in order (duly indianised of course, say to Operation Mogambo). Big deal that! As if there never has been a Bollywood remake of Hollywood movies!

(Truth is mostly unpalatable…but truth cannot be ignored! Here we serve the truth, seasoned with salt and pepper and a dash of sauce (iness!). You can record your burps, belches and indigestion, if any, at snp_ajazbaba@yahoo.com)

Lastupdate on : Sat, 7 May 2011 21:30:00 Makkah time
Lastupdate on : Sat, 7 May 2011 18:30:00 GMT
Lastupdate on : Sun, 8 May 2011 00:00:00 IST