Collusion Partners!

“…you see he kept coming back every year to apologize!”

Salt N' Pepper


“Do you think it will last?” my friend who had been poring over last weeks’ newspapers said to no one in particular.
“What?” I asked.
“The coalition! It seems to be more of a collision sometimes. Like this fellow from one of the coalition partners is always lambasting the other party. And there is this guy from the other party who seems to be hell bent upon making this party uncomfortable to which incidentally he belonged before joining the other one!”
I smiled. At one time I had harbored similar ‘fears’ but time and experience had made me wiser so I hastened to address my friend’s apprehensions. “My dear these coalitions are more of collusions although at times it does appear that the partners are on a collision course. Take this recent case of the House Committee that fell upon itself like a house of cards. The parties showed that their differences can evaporate in a moment when the occasion calls for it.”
“A strange affair though isn’t it?” he said in a voice full of doubt.
“Well let me tell you a story that might illustrate matters somewhat,” I offered and related the following tale:
There was this lady who filed for a divorce from her husband. The day her case came up for the ‘hearing’ she was present in the courtroom along with a brood of children of different ages and sizes. The Hon’ble judge started the proceedings and asked her how long she had been married.
 “Ten years m’lord!” the lady declared loud and clear (a trifle too loud perhaps because many a finger wriggled in many an ear in the courtroom!).
 “And you say you have been ‘separated’ since eight years?”
 “Yes m’lord!”
 “So it is only two years that you stayed together – you and your husband, I mean – after marriage?”
 “Yes m’lord!” the lady assented in her booming voice.
 “Brave man!” somebody shouted from the back of the courtroom.
 This gave rise to quite a bit of giggling and sniggering. A ghost of a smile flitted across m’lord’s face as well but before it could convert into unbecoming hilarity, out came a handkerchief and m’lord ostensibly sneezed, snorted and blew his nose into it.
 “Alright!” the hon’ble judge banged his gavel on his table calling the courtroom to order, as soon as his own features had settled into appropriate solemnity. Just then his glance fell upon the brood of children accompanying the lady, all of whom were arrayed around her. As he stared at the assortment of children, the eldest of the collection stuck out his tongue at him, crossed his eyes and contorted his snub-nosed features, all this at the speed of light, in a flash so as to say! The Hon’ble looked around surreptitiously to see whether any one else had witnessed this scandalous exchange. Apparently no one had so the Hon’ble thought that a well aimed forbidding frown was sufficient reaction to this ‘contempt of court’. Having done the needful, he cleared his throat and once again addressed the lady, “Ahem! Are all these young chaps with you?”
 “Yes, m’lord! They are my children!” the lady said, her voice betraying a mother’s pride.
 “Your children!” m’lord said with a start. “Are all of these your children?!”
 “Yes, m’lord! My very own!” the proud mother beamed.
 “And who be their father?” the Hon’ble persisted.
 “That fellow over there, m’lord.” The lady pointed towards her husband from whom she was seeking a divorce.
 The judge got quite confused and as was his unconscious habit when his mind would be agitated by some knotty point, he took off his glasses and began to polish them vigorously.
 “Now let me get this straight,” he said, addressing the lady, “you say you have been married for ten years?”
 “Yes, m’lord!”
 “And you have filed for divorce citing that you have been separated,” he said, consulting his notes, “since last eight years?”
 “Yes, m’lord!”
 “That means that you stayed together for only two years after your marriage?”
 “Yes, m’lord!”
 “Then how on earth did all these fellows,” he started counting her brood, “seven of them to be precise…er…materialize?!”
 “Eight, m’lord!” she corrected him, lifting up a basket and proudly exhibiting the infant sleeping peacefully therein!
 “Well…er…yes, eight of them! How come?!” the judge asked, looking a picture of perplexity.
 “M’lord it is true that we never saw eye-to-eye on any issue, quarreled day and night, disagreed on everything under the sun (or the shade for that matter!), so much so that we got ‘separated’ after only two years of marriage but…,” the good lady added somewhat bashfully, “…you see he kept coming back every year to apologize!”
 “It is exactly the same with these coalitions. They manage to be in collusion even when they appear to be in collision…”’ I concluded my story. It was evident by the smile on his face that my friend had got the point.

Truth is mostly unpalatable…but truth cannot be ignored! Here we serve the truth, seasoned with salt and pepper and a dash of sauce (iness!). You can record your burps, belches and indigestion, if any, at

Lastupdate on : Fri, 16 Nov 2012 21:30:00 Makkah time
Lastupdate on : Fri, 16 Nov 2012 18:30:00 GMT
Lastupdate on : Sat, 17 Nov 2012 00:00:00 IST

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