The Pesky Street Monsters…

It was the acquittal of Salman Khan by the Hon'ble Court that encouraged Sir John, Jani, to buy an old second hand car.
The Pesky Street Monsters…
Representational Pic

It was the acquittal of Salman Khan by the Hon'ble Court that encouraged Sir John, Jani, to buy an old second hand car. Earlier Jani, was scared of the traffic rules, the cops standing at the corners with bill books in their hands and the mere thought of spending nights in the dark lockup would petrify him in the event of hurting anyone due to his sloppy driving skills. But now looking at the traffic mess on the streets, how unabashed chains of vehicles multiply the single lanes into doubles and triples only to gridlock the unruly traffic and how the procedures could be twisted to your favor in case you err while driving, Jani braced himself up to join the flock of amateur drivers on the streets.  

Jani, had pinched out little savings from his routine expenses for 15 years to pile a small sum that would suffice to buy a modest small sized second hand car. Some years back when his mother had asked him to approach the bank for loan to buy a new car for himself so that she too becomes the 'baid ded' in her mohalla, Jani, right away refused for the fear of its compounding 'interest' that, he prudently thought, would in turn compound his worries. Jani had just started his search for a second hand car on OLX and Quikr, when his neighbor, a friend in the times of such crises, bumped into and advised him to visit the second hand car market. The twosome visited some of the known second hand car dealers but were disappointed, given their budgetary limitations. While walking back home, Jani's friend, suddenly caught attention to the cars standing in one of the markets mainly dealing with the scarp. After spending good deal of their energy into the bargain they succeeded in clinching the deal for an old rusted car. The seller somehow managed to start the car and dispatched his gullible customers in the car.

On reaching home Jani found all the neighborhood women waiting outside his house who had been invited by his mother to welcome Jani's first car with the traditional 'wanvun'. Jani after maneuvering car to the edge of his gate stopped and found himself being bundled out of the car to receive the congratulatory kisses from all female neighbors on his forehead. Red-faced with what was happening, Jani managed to reach his mother who was harping around, 'balaie lazchus az aninam gaed', asked her to sit in the car to pay obeisance on buying his first car at Makdoom Sahabs. Behind the wheels, when Jani turned the key, the car did not start. With the long screeches of dead engine Jani's mother skipped heart beats. Being comfortably seated in the rear, with the idea of flaunting the luxury, she was subjected to grave humiliation in presence of her neighbors. Jani, giving up after many attempts to start it, helplessly requested his friend to push it from the behind. Along with his friend, all the women watching the show, started pushing the car. Suddenly the car came to life, Jani, embarrassed to the pink cheeks, failed to control the pedals and straightaway knocked into the wall of a neighbor. The neighbor, who was already jealous of Jani's latest display of affluence, came out shouting and swearing all kinds of invectives to Jani and his car. You bloody get car loans from the bank and then flaunt being rich. You choke the roads and kill people. You break the traffic rules and subject the common people to troubles. You pollute the atmosphere and force the governments to formulate outrageous policies like 'plying of odd and even vehicle' or banning diesel vehicles. You park your cars on the roadside only to clog already narrow roads. And you kill poor people sleeping on the foot paths when you lose control over your cars like you just did.

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