Looks are oftentimes deceptive, as is made manifest in the social scenario here. While outwardly Kashmir definitely boasts of one of the largest numbers of literate women in India, it is also drenched in the shame of having a sex ratio of 892, which is much lower than the national average of 940. All one can pull out of this anomaly is the fact that people here do not want to give birth to and raise the girl child. Yet, if a girl is born, she is to be well-educated. And this is only the urban citizenry!
In a valley whose constituent pillars are two proficient women – Habba Khatoon with her bold poetry amidst a dominance of male poets and Lala Ded with her mystic philosophies amidst a string of male ascetics– one would assume that women would be held in high esteem. Yet, legend has it that even Lala Ded faced maltreatment at the hands of the family she was married into and sure enough, history finds a way to repeat itself. Reports suggest that there have been increasing instances of domestic violence against women in Kashmir, ranging from mere thrashings to attempts at stifling. On an average, the state women’s commission receives 20 complaints of domestic violence daily. This pathetic status quo can be attributed to the widespread mindset that “patriarchy is the law of the house”. While these instances are more commonplace in semi-urban and rural localities, they are none the less issues of a grave nature.
It would be pure mania to say that Kashmir’s atmosphere is wholesome. It is, as we all know, far from it. Amidst this chaos, we find ways to allow the youth to burgeon, conveniently ignoring one section of the population that suffers equally – the women. Women of the valley find themselves under a constant sense of paranoia and, with the society constantly looking down upon psychiatry, they feel deprived of a vent or outlet or even solace. Mothers whose sons are missing, young widows with no one to turn to, parents with children facing accusations of militancy, all fall prey to their mental build-up of ever-heightening agitation and exacerbation. Perhaps, this could provide us with a lead as to why there has been, even if gone unnoticed, a rapid increment in number of females from Kashmir resorting to drug abuse, resulting in increasing cases of Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and the like, and ultimately, infertility, which is yet another stigma for women in Kashmiri society.
While it most certainly is gladdening that females from the valley are getting more and more inclined towards formal education, there still remains a pressing affair. In remote villages, even now, all that the girls are taught is household chores. Were the parents to even consider schooling for them, the huge distance between the domicile and school hinder them from doing so. This inaccessibility to education is perhaps the most pressing set of iron chains that are slung around the female’s neck right at the time of birth. At the same time, there is another set of chains ensnaring the urban female who is being educated viz. career choices. Pardon me for saying that half the state wants to make a doctor out of its daughters, or at the very least a government officer. While having ambitions for your daughter is no crime, allowing your passion for her career to get to a point of suppression of her own vocation should be made one. Just how many dissatisfied females can one state handle? We owe it to the girl child to let her seek her calling and allow for the blossoming of novel Habba Khatoons and Lalla Deds and Zoona Begums.
While this may sound like a rant, it most certainly is not. It is a mere attempt at compelling my state mates to break out of their cocoon of denial and address issues that haunt our women even now, in the 21st century. The fact that we are already on an upward sloping graph to women empowerment is an indication that we mustn’t stop, but tread on and on to the zenith.
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